PACIFIC NORTHWEST #3: A Trip to the Goon Docks

Having children means having an excuse to revisit one’s childhood, and I’m thrilled that my daughter is finally old enough to watch the movies I grew up loving as a kid.  Just a few months ago, she saw THE GOONIES for the first time—and immediately proclaimed it “her favorite movie.”  Within a few days, she had moved on to a new “favorite” (THE KARATE KID, maybe?) but I was still elated… especially knowing that we were about to make a family trip to the real-world “Goon Docks” in Astoria, Oregon.

Just as the town of Brownsville has embraced STAND BY ME, the town of Astoria has embraced THE GOONIES… to an extent.  Astoria hosts the Oregon Film Museum, which turns out to be more of a standing tribute to the Steven Spielberg-produced film than a general celebration of movie-making in Oregon.  And just as there is an annual STAND BY ME day in Brownsville (July 23^rd this year), there is an annual "GOONIES day" in Astoria (on June 7^th).

The museum is housed in the old Clatsop County jail, where Mama Fratelli helps her eldest son Jake escape at the beginning of the film.  The getaway vehicle is a black ORV… which, today, is parked out in front of the museum.  (If it’s not the same vehicle used in the film, I’m impressed with the attention to detail… There are bullet holes in the back door, just like Chunk said.)

"ORV..."

"... bullet holes..."

 

But I’m getting ahead of myself.  Our tour of Goonies land actually started at Ecola State Park.  That’s where the Fratellis' hideout was located, on a bluff overlooking Crescent Beach and Cannon Beach.  On the latter, Mama Fratelli drove the ORV through a cluster of similar vehicles to make her escape.  The distinctive Cannon beachscape is defined by a group of massive “bird rocks."  The largest one is known as Haystack Rock. 

Elk grazing next to the parking lot at Ecola State Park

The Ecola State Park day-use area, where the Fratelli hideout was located

The view from the Fratelli's hideout, looking south toward Cannon Beach

Cannon Beach, looking south

Cannon Beach, looking north toward Haystack Rock

THE GOONIES would have you believe that Ecola Point and Cannon Beach are a short bike ride from Astoria.  In fact, Haystack Rock is only barely visible (on a clear day) from the top of Astoria Column, which looks down on the historic town…. reputedly, the oldest settlement west of the Rockies.  

On a clear day, you can see Haystack Rock in the distance.  If you look very closely at the center of this photo...

Astoria

In a place with such a long history, it’s not surprising that there is some disconnect between the culture of the “locals” and the movie-centered culture of the tourists.  Just across the street from the Oregon Film Museum is the Flavel House Museum, home of the Clatsop County Historical Society.  In THE GOONIES, Mikey's father works here and the pirate map that leads the misfit kids to buried treasure is a "reject" from his carefully-curated historical treasures.  Only the irreverent kids recognize the true value of the map.

I sympathize with the outsiders (because I am one), and admit that during our brief 24-hour stay in Astoria, I did not tour the Flavel House Museum.  

I did, on the other hand,  do a drive-by of Ally Sheedy’s house from the 1986 movie SHORT CIRCUIT.   It’s not a great movie, but the house has a breathtaking view of the Astoria-Megler Bridge.  

The SHORT CIRCUIT house

On the far east side of town is another memorable filming location: the elementary school from the Arnold Schwarzenegger vehicle KINDERGARTEN COP (this movie actually holds up better today than SHORT CIRCUIT), right down the street from Mikey (Sean Astin)’s house in THE GOONIES.  I took a stroll through the neighborhood, but didn’t bother to visit Mikey's house—because, apparently, the current owners are none too fond of Goonies.  Thankfully, a few neighbors are much happier to fly the Goonies flag.

This is where Arnold Schwarzenegger learned that boys have a penis, girls have a vagina.

Mikey's house from THE GOONIES, viewed from a boringly respectful distance

Flying the flag

Down on the docks below this neighborhood is a charming fisherman’s wharf, which is currently home to a loud bunch of barking sea lions (native goonies?).  This is where the ships still come in, slipping under the Astoria-Megler Bridge.  And on the other side of the bridge… miles and miles of virgin forest, at the southern edge of Washington state.  

Next stop: Twin Peaks

PS - For an even more elaborate virtual tour of the Goon Docks, check out this website.